There are several factors that motivate people to stay in the workforce, and money is the most important reason/factor. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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There is no doubt these days the
overall
individulas
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individuals
individual
controversy surrounding the employee matter .The question is what is the
termendously
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tremendously
vital way to encourage people in term job ?
Im
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In
this
esay
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essay
I am going to draw my opinion about
this
issue . In terms of the effective
methoud
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method
methods
to enhance worker performance through financial rewards .The main reason given to support the claim is ,
significant
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a significant
show examples
number of people had been working hard enough in order to get money . To illustrate that most
of
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apply
show examples
the parents
nowadys
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nowadays
they
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apply
show examples
are focusing on their
children
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children's
show examples
education and enforce them to pass exams , with good
mark
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marks
show examples
this
will
incrase
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increase
the
apportunity
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opportunity
to have a
perfct
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perfect
job in future.
Consequenty
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Consequently
, the
persone
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person
with
hight
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high
show examples
qulified
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qualified
education must
be earn
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be earned
show examples
alot
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a lot
of
menoy
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money
memory
.
Moreover
, there are various
method
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methods
show examples
to motivate the residents but have been
modest
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the modest
a modest
show examples
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
on them .
Firstly
, some
instituation
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institution
institutions
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
there
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their
show examples
staff
thruogh
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through
the special course ,
this
is a modern pattern followed in most of them
neverthieless
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nevertheless
to improve and
develope informations
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develop information
and skills.
Scondely
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Secondly
, extra vacation days
while
the team have been the did
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
great and good work
this
is the way to
appreciet
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appreciate
them . In conclusion,
although
there is
diffirent
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different
pattern to motivate staff woh who had been
work
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working
worked
show examples
in
proper
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the proper
a proper
show examples
method .
Therefore
i
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I
show examples
belevie
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believe
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
financial award is the best to
appreciat
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appreciate
them
nd
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and
show examples
change the work
enviroment
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environment
toward success .
Submitted by dhmshitaghreed on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • basic needs
  • career advancement
  • pension
  • job satisfaction
  • sense of purpose
  • social connections
  • workplace relationships
  • intellectual stimulation
  • societal norms
  • earning potential
  • motivation
  • livelihood
  • financial independence
  • professional growth
What to do next:
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