the number of people interested in cosmetic surgery is increasing in order to improve their physical appearance. why do people do operations to change their look? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#people #surgery #appearance #operations #change #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays cosmetic

surgery

Use synonyms

is a rather controversial topic. Some

people

Use synonyms

think that

this

Linking Words

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

can not be

apreciate

Correct your spelling

appreciated

appreciate

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

modern society ,

while

Linking Words

others find

such

Linking Words

kind of

operations

Fix the agreement mistake

operation

show examples

a great

possibillity

Correct your spelling

possibility

for improving

face's

Correct article usage

the face's

show examples

features. In my opinion cosmetic

surgery

Use synonyms

is a positive development because it can

increases

Change the verb form

increase

show examples

quality

Add an article

the quality

show examples

of life and removes the consequences of different unhappy accidents. First of

all

Add a comma

,all

show examples

it is difficult to decline that some members of modern society can not be satisfied

Change the preposition

with

show examples

their life because these ones think that they have

unpleasant

Add an article

an unpleasant

show examples

appearance

Fix the agreement mistake

appearances

show examples

. In some

cases

Add a comma

,cases

show examples

desired features can improve not only

appearance

Correct pronoun usage

their appearance

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

their feelings about themselves and bring

fullfilled

Correct your spelling

fulfilled

life.

For instance

Linking Words

, some

asians

Change the capitalization

Asians

show examples

have expanded

thier

Correct your spelling

their

eyes and

this

Linking Words

allows them

behave

Add the particle

to behave

show examples

themselves with more confidence.

Linking Words

Moreover

Add a comma

,Moreover

show examples

sometimes cosmetic

surgery

Use synonyms

becomes very

neccesary

Correct your spelling

necessary

. Unfortunately, in the modern world, where are a lot of different vehicles and a lot of dangerous

hobby

Change to a plural noun

hobbies

show examples

, scars or other

unpleasent

Correct your spelling

unpleasant

thing

Change the wording

things

show examples

can be got caused by accidents.

Linking Words

Additionally

Add a comma

,Additionally

show examples

some

people

Use synonyms

have had marks on

the

Change the word

their

show examples

body since birth, which

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

attract too

many

Correct quantifier usage

much

show examples

bad attention. In these

cases

Add a comma

,cases

show examples

cosmetic operations can hide all problems and help

people

Use synonyms

make their faces clean and

beutiful

Correct your spelling

beautiful

again.

For instance

Linking Words

, it is

rather

Correct article usage

a rather

show examples

popular

practise

Replace the word

practice

show examples

disguised

Wrong verb form

disguise

show examples

scars after different medical operations. In conclusion, I believe that cosmetic

surgery

Use synonyms

is an amazing

achievment

Correct your spelling

achievement

Change preposition

for

show examples

humanity

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because it gives

people

Use synonyms

chance to be

staisfied

Correct your spelling

satisfied

and

also

Linking Words

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

recover

Correct pronoun usage

them recover

show examples

from situations, where their

apperance

Correct your spelling

appearance

have damaged.

However

Linking Words

, I am convinced that it is

also

Linking Words

very crucial for

people

Use synonyms

to be able to love themselves

with

Change preposition

despite

show examples

all their disadvantages.

Submitted by galima.ant on Sun Apr 16 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people think that all unviersity students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In recent years many people assume that we should study subjects that we are interested in. Is it good to study subjects whatever we like than those which will be useful in the future? Some people believe allowing students to learn practical matter for the upcoming days, whereas others believe otherwise. However, I strongly believe that the advantages of letting scholars to choose the favorite subjects outweigh the drawbacks.
5
band
Can money bring happiness to people? Should people rather focus on moral values instead?
The concept of happiness breaks into countless interpretations, making it impossible to quantify. People generally fall into two groups regarding the relationship between money and happiness, sparking endless debates. In my perspective, money serves as a tool to achieve the peak of happiness. If you aim to maintain good health to cherish moments with your family and experience joy, money will become indispensable for securing that health.
6.5
band
Students should pay full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
There is a common belief that in university education, all fees for their own study should be paid by pupils because personal university advantages are more than that in social life. In my opinion, I predominantly disagree with this statement for the reasons of finance and balance, which will elaborate on the reasons.
8
band
You were absent from an important event held by the company you work for. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: Apologize for your absence and explain the reasoning? Explain why you had to be at the other event? Explain what you will do to catch up?
I am writing this letter to give an explanation and apologize for my absence from the annual general meeting held on 10th December 2023.
6
band
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Your friend is thinking about learning to drive and would like some advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • say why a driving licence is advantageous • recommend a driving school • give any extra guidance/tips You do NOT need to write any addresses.
I hope you and the family are in the pink of health. I am writing this letter to give you some inputs on learning driving. To start learning driving is a good decision. Now you can apply for learning driving license till your driving lessons are not completed. It an advantage to have driving license as you can use it in abroad also for driving purpose.

the number of people interested in cosmetic surgery is increasing in order to improve their physical appearance. why do people do operations to change their look? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that all unviersity students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Can money bring happiness to people? Should people rather focus on moral values instead?

Students should pay full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

You were absent from an important event held by the company you work for. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: Apologize for your absence and explain the reasoning? Explain why you had to be at the other event? Explain what you will do to catch up?