some people say that professional workers such as doctors, nurse, and teachers, who make greater contribution to the society should be paid more than those people in the field of sports and entertainment. to what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #workers #doctors #nurse #teachers #contribution #society #field #sports #entertainment

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To begin

with, at present some

people

say that professionals like doctors and teachers should be paid more as their contribution is higher than that of

people

in the fields like sports and entertainment. But, I do not agree with the above statement as it is cannot be compared. First and foremost, there is no

such

way to measure the value one gives to

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society based on his or her job. Our society is diverse with multiple careers and there's no

such

requirement for everyone to stick to a certain profession.

Furthermore

people

choose their paths based on their interests and skills. So , sportsmen, musicians and dancers are

also

very much needed for the well-being of society.

For instance

, by forcing a person to become a teacher or a nurse is not effective if that person loves making sculptures. You can get the best out of a person when he enjoys the job.

Additionally

, sports and entertainment are

also

essential to maintain the mental health of the community. There is evidence that

people

enjoyed and admired art and crafts even in the prehistoric era indicating their value to human beings. Even today

also

we love watching shows and games in order to be relaxed from our busy schedules.

Moreover

, nowadays school students are encouraged to participate in sports and to learn to play at least a single instrument.

To conclude

Add an article

the

show examples

occupational contribution is subjective and it varies from one to another.

According to

my point of view, I believe that all careers are equally required and important to the betterment of the community and should be paid without any discrimination.

Submitted by vishvaisuranga on Mon Apr 17 2023

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Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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some people say that professional workers such as doctors, nurse, and teachers, who make greater contribution to the society should be paid more than those people in the field of sports and entertainment. to what extent do you agree or disagree

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Nowadays, some workplaces tend to employ equal numbers of men and women workers. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

​​Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and families. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?