Some people believe that travelling is a valuable experience; others say it is a waste of time and money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Travelling plays an instrumental role in everyone's life. In
this
essay
some Add a comma
essay,
people
think that go
somewhere is Wrong verb form
going
good
experience and some Add an article
a good
says
it is a Change the verb form
say
waste
of time
as well as
money
. Both views are discussed in the following paragraph and
Correct word choice
apply
along with
my prespective
.
Correct your spelling
perspective
To begin
with, travelling is the
good experience for Correct article usage
a
people
, if people
go outside in this
way they can learn a lot of things. People
go out of country
and learn other's Add an article
the country
people
culture as well as
language and one most important thing is that they can know
Verb problem
learn
how's
Unnecessary verb
how
oher
Correct your spelling
other
people
lives and try different varities
of food and clothes. Correct your spelling
varieties
For example
, chinese
Change the capitalization
Chinese
people
wear different types of clothes and eat different foods. With the help of travelling, people
can spend time
with loved ones. Nextly, travelling provide
relaxation and smoothing life from Change the verb form
provides
hectic
schedule because everyone Correct article usage
a hectic
busy
Add a missing verb
is busy
to earn
Change the verb form
earning
money
and fame they have no time
to spend time
with family, with travelling they can fell
fresh and more energetic and spend valuable Correct your spelling
feel
time
.
On the flip side, every coins
has two sides, there are some reasons travelling is a Change to a singular noun
coin
waste
of time
and money
. Firstly
, people
can waste
a lot of money
when they go outside for example
if they go out of country
they spend a lot of amount on tickets , food and clothes , One thing is that they live in Add an article
the country
a country
the
hotels and everyone knows the Correct article usage
apply
hotels
price in Change to a genitive case
hotel's
hotels'
europe
countries. Change the capitalization
Europe
Secondaly
, Correct your spelling
Secondly
people
take holidays from work and some companies do not provide paid holidays in this
way they waste
money
in double manners.
To
conclusion, in my opinion, Change preposition
In
people
should go for
travelling and take some Change preposition
apply
time
for ourselves
and spend Correct pronoun usage
themselves
time
with families
and enjoy life.Correct pronoun usage
their families
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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay by organizing your ideas more coherently.
task achievement
Ensure that your essay fully responds to the task by discussing both views and giving your own opinion. Provide more comprehensive and relevant examples to support your ideas.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite