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Overconsumption of sugar is unhealthy. Some people think that governments should take the responsibility to control sugar intake while others think it is the responsibility of individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.opinion about it.

#overconsumption #sugar #people #governments #responsibility #control #intake #individuals
Consuming large amounts of sugary
foods
 could result in health problems in the future.
However
, some believe that individuals should be responsible for controlling their
sugar
 consumption,
while
 others believe
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 the
government
's role. In my view, it is the
government
 who should regulate the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of sweet
products
 on the market. When people take the notion that each and every person is supposed to make sure that they watch the
amount
 of
sugar
 they consume, they are usually
refering
Correct your spelling
referring
 to people who are health
consious
Correct your spelling
conscious
. If someone understands the negative effects of taking in a lot of sugars,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they are likely to reduce or stop eating them.
On the other hand
, even if they want to, they find it difficult because there are no other alternatives.
For instance
, there has been a growing concern that most South African school tuckshops sell sweets, chocolates and cakes
instead
 of fruits which put the children at risk of
non communicable
Add a hyphen
non-communicable
show examples
 diseases in the
lon
Correct your spelling
long
 run. In order that
sugar
 intake
is
Change the verb form
to be
show examples
 reduced, the
government
 should
be make
Change the verb form
make
show examples
 sure that it controls the
amount
 of
sugar
that is
 put in
foods
such
 as fizzy drinks, juices, alcohol, bread and cakes. These are the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
foods
 mostly consumed by a large number of people on a daily basis.
This
 can be done by introducing
Correct article usage
a sugar-tax
show examples
sugar-tax
Correct your spelling
sugar tax
show examples
.
For example
, introducing
this
 worked significantly in the UK,
such
 that the South African
government
also
 introduced it.
As a result
, the companies reduced
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of
sugar
 they added to their
products
 and as well increased their prices.
Hence
, the consumers couldn't afford to buy them in large quantities.
Besides
 these stiff laws, the authorities can
also
 regulate the types of
foods
 that should be sold in schools
as well as
making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 sure that sweet items which are normally placed in tills be placed
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the back shelves of the supermarkets.
This
 prevents impulse buying associated with the purchase of these goods. Moreso, advertisements of
such
products
 can be stopped by the
government
 and be replaced by healthier
foods
 which include vegetables and fruits. In conclusion,
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 intake of sugary
foods
 results in an unhealthy nation. Even if individuals try to reduce eating them,
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 remains a governmental responsibility to
reduces
Wrong verb form
reduce
show examples
 these
products
 by regulating production and advertisements.
Submitted by rosstigere on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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