In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents' absence.
Nowadays people live in
very
competitive world and the rhythms of modern Add an article
a very
the very
life
dictate their own rules. As can be Use synonyms
seen
Add a comma
,seen
work
-Use synonyms
life
boundaries are blurred which can impact negative changes not only on lifestyle as a whole, but Use synonyms
in particular
on parent-child relationships. Linking Words
However
, the global financial crisis pushes people to look for extra Linking Words
work
to maintain Use synonyms
family’s
financial stability.
It’s not a secret, that structure of a modern family is not the same as it was a century ago. The position of Correct pronoun usage
their family’s
women
has been changed. In the past Use synonyms
women
occupied a very low position in Use synonyms
family
with no rights and freedom. For centuries raising Add an article
a family
the family
children
has been thought Use synonyms
as
“Change preposition
of as
women
’s Use synonyms
work
”, Use synonyms
women
took full responsibility for childbirth, childcare and domestic Use synonyms
work
. The situation has changed after Use synonyms
women
’s empowerment. The main feature of Use synonyms
modern
family is the economic independence of Add an article
the modern
women
, nowadays both Use synonyms
parents
leaves the home for Use synonyms
a
Remove the article
apply
work
and Use synonyms
build
their career. But it doesn’t change the fact that Fix the infinitive
to build
children
need Use synonyms
parents
to be involved in their Use synonyms
life
, they need care and love. Parent’s employment, Use synonyms
lack
Correct word choice
and lack
communication
with Change preposition
of communication
the
child has a bad impact on Change the word
their
children
’s Use synonyms
life
. Self-discipline, Use synonyms
emotional
development Correct word choice
and emotional
are
stunned without parental guidance and involvement, because Change the verb form
is
parents
are the model for their Use synonyms
children
. Without parental Use synonyms
control
their child can even join peer groups with low moral and social standards.
Add a comma
,control
However
, Linking Words
parents
are driven not only by careerism or personal ambition. Desire to earn more money to make their child’s Use synonyms
life
less challenging makes Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
to
Change the verb form
apply
work
more and harder. Use synonyms
This
would enable Linking Words
to
provide better education, Correct pronoun usage
them to
better
health care Correct word choice
and better
service
to their child. Modern Fix the agreement mistake
services
children
have all they want, Use synonyms
such
as different circles and Linking Words
sport
sections. Job Change the noun form
sports
parents
could provide Use synonyms
children
with expensive toys, clothes, trips, Use synonyms
camping
. Correct word choice
and camping
Moreover
, when both Linking Words
parents
are busy at Use synonyms
work
enough, the risk of development of overprotection syndrome is much lower and Use synonyms
kid
rises as a very independent person.
In conclusion, I would like to say that it is hard to keep a traditional family structure nowadays. Correct article usage
the kid
Life
is changing and it’s very important to improve a Use synonyms
life
-Use synonyms
work
balance. Job Use synonyms
parents
have Use synonyms
less
opportunities to look after their Change the quantifier
fewer
children
but they need to realize their Use synonyms
kids
mental and emotional needs. At the same Change noun form
kid's
kids'
time
it’s essential to earn enough money to provide a resource Add a comma
,time
of
kids’ future.Change preposition
for
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Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.