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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it’s more important to reward students who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music, and good behavior). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, the education system is giving awards to successful
students
 in order to motivate them.
This
 has led to an argument about which
students
 should be awarded.
While
 some think that schools should focus on academic achievements, others think that
success
 in other fields should be awarded. In my opinion, all types of
success
 should be honoured. On one side, there are several benefits gained by awarding pupils with high scores.
Firstly
, schools are the place where smart kids feel special as they show their talents in difficult subjects
such
 as math and physics. These talented
students
 are the future of our world.
This
 is why we need to motivate them so as to keep improving and the best way to do
that is
 by honouring them every time they made an achievement.
Secondly
, many children have good qualities but they need a reason to make an effort. To illustrate
this
, some parents use a carrot-and-stick approach to obtain good results. In
this
 way, youngsters have the needed motivation to work harder and get better scores. On the other side, our world needs more than just academic
success
. The world we live in requires us to improve in all aspects. Sports,
for example
, are a vital part of our modern life. It is the best way to keep good health and fit.
This
 is why, we have to award-successful athletes in school because they can set a good role model for all of us.
Moreover
, good behaviour is another reason to honour
students
 who behave well in a class. Awarding
students
 who respect their teachers and other
students
 might set an example for all
students
 to follow. These are good ways to improve our lives. The education system awards successful
students
.
However
, there is an argument about which kind of
successment
Correct your spelling
succession
 should be awarded. Some argue that academic
success
 must be awarded, others believe that other forms of
success
 must have
this
 honour. I believe that schools should award all kinds of
success
 as it improves our lives.
Submitted by ahmedelhanshiry on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Scholastic achievement
  • Intellectual effort
  • Merit-based
  • Academic excellence
  • Educational outcomes
  • Well-rounded development
  • Multiple intelligences
  • Fosters self-esteem
  • Extracurricular involvement
  • Personal growth
  • Holistic approach
  • Diverse talents
  • Societal implications
What to do next:
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