In recent years, there has been growing interest in the relationship between equality and personal achievement. Some people believe that individuals can achieve more in egalitarian societies. Others believe that high levels of personal achievement are possible only if individuals are free to succeed or fail according to their individual merits. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In recent decades, there is reported to have been a considerable debate on whether or not individual achievement is greater in egalitarian or more hierarchical societies. In my opinion, despite the benefits of egalitarianism as a political principle, it should not be pursued as a social ideal. Those who argue egalitarian societies are better for achievement point out the benefits of
the
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opportunity. The most well-known examples of
this
are in socialist nations in Europe like France where income disparity is less pronounced than in more capitalist countries. In
such
liberal countries, a person can receive a good education, secure stable employment, receive unemployment benefits in the case of an economic downturn, and support the rest of
society
by paying high taxes. Being part of
such
a community is itself a motivation for individuals to perform well at work and pursue life goals.
This
is especially the case as a person will not have to feel anxious about the possibility of being left behind by
society
at large. I would contend that when conditions are generally equal individuals should
then
be permitted to compete without considerable governmental regulation. The standout example of
this
situation would be in the United States.
Although
there are more problems related to income inequality, there is
also
greater innovation across a variety of sectors. One cause of
this
is that individuals are motivated by the desire to excel and earn the financial rewards that accompany success. A person is
therefore
encouraged to attain their own definition of success or they might be forced to live *on the fringes of
society
. In conclusion, though there is a cruel element to competition, it is the best way to encourage innovation and growth in an individual and
society
as a whole. Naturally,
such
an approach is only possible when systemic problems related to discrimination have first been eliminated.
Submitted by engroutine on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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