Some people believe that it is important to spend a lot of money on family celebrations. While others think it is a waste of money. Discuss both views. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 254 words.

There is no doubt that family is

main

Add an article

the main

show examples

reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

development

Correct article usage

the development

show examples

and growth of any society.Health relations between

indivduals

Correct your spelling

individuals

will result in

Correct article usage

a health

show examples

health

Replace the word

healthy

show examples

productive community. Recently, The importance of family parties and the amount of

money

Use synonyms

spended

Correct your spelling

spent

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

these

event

Fix the agreement mistake

events

show examples

has now become more controversial with many

claim

Wrong verb form

claiming

show examples

that it is worth spending

while

Linking Words

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

reject

this

Linking Words

notion.

This

Linking Words

eassy

Correct your spelling

essay

easy

will

illustrates

Change the verb form

illustrate

show examples

both sides and their supporting

arguements

Correct your spelling

arguments

. On

one

Correct article usage

the one

show examples

side, the key and vital reason why people spend

huge

Add an article

a huge

show examples

amount of

money

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

family celebrations is that these

event

Change the determiner

events

show examples

connect family members.

Moreover

Linking Words

, many

individual

Change to a plural noun

individuals

show examples

family

Correct article usage

the family

show examples

lives in

far

Add an article

the far

show examples

area and rarely can join in

these event

Change the determiner

this event

these events

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

, family member memories

last

Linking Words

forever holding

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

of joyful moments.

Also

Linking Words

, building

strong

Add an article

a strong

show examples

bond

Fix the agreement mistake

bonds

show examples

between

indviduals

Correct your spelling

individuals

Change preposition

show examples

contrasting

Correct article usage

the contrasting

show examples

side,one clear disadvantage

about

Change preposition

show examples

these gathering is that

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

money

Use synonyms

spend

Change the form of the verb

spent

show examples

short

Add an article

the short

a short

show examples

period that

last

Linking Words

for

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

hours.

Also

Linking Words

, many

family

Change to a plural noun

families

show examples

take loans from banks and stay years in debt rather than spend

these

Change the determiner

this money

show examples

money

Use synonyms

on education or

esstenial

Correct your spelling

essential

family needs. Not only

money

Use synonyms

is wasted but

also

Linking Words

large

Change the article

a large

show examples

amount of food is wasted.

For instance

Linking Words

, studied

conduct

Wrong verb form

conducted

show examples

Correct article usage

the university

show examples

university

Correct your spelling

University

show examples

jordan

Change the capitalization

Jordan

show examples

showed that more than 40% of food is wasted

Change preposition

during

show examples

these celebrations

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

could have saved many families who are facing food

shortage

Fix the agreement mistake

shortages

show examples

. On balance, in my personal view,

althought

Correct your spelling

although

these celebrations

last

Linking Words

years and years but spending

money

Use synonyms

on vital fields is more

importance

Replace the word

important

show examples

. I

beliveve

Correct your spelling

believe

that family members should meet up and enjoy time together to connect

Correct word choice

and bond

show examples

bond

Fix the agreement mistake

bonds

show examples

among its members in simple classic events.

mabuzayedfamily

Apr 29, 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
49
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that it is better to take part in team sports, while others believe that individual sports are better. Discuss both these views and Give your opinion.