IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Environmental problems are too big for individual countries and individual people to address. We have reached the stage where the only way to protect the environment to address it at an international level. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#countries #people #address #stage #environment #level
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Living in the world we cannot set aside the problem
arises
Correct pronoun usage
that arises
show examples
 about the
environment
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. Environmental is still
big
Add an article
a big
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 concern for many
countries
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 to cope with, even though the
government
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 in any country have made the policy to address with big effort but the problems still not to be clear
with
Change preposition
apply
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. Here, I believe that
government
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 should participate international state community to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
communication with other
countries
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 to solve the problems together. To start with, in individual
Use synonyms
countries
Add a comma
,countries
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government
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 is obligated to solve the
issue
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 happening to satisfy the right of
society
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 but the
issue
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 that always
pay
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pays
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 attention
is
Change preposition
to is
show examples
Correct article usage
the environmental
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environmental
Replace the word
environment
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.
However
Linking Words
, the
society
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 itself still not to be aware
about
Change the preposition
of
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 the condition of
Use synonyms
environment
Add an article
the environment
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,
for instance
Linking Words
, the pollution as the effect of using the carbon emission vehicle.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
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 have made
the
Correct article usage
a
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 campaign to the community to look after the effect using carbon emission
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
but
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 it is not effective to address
with
Change preposition
apply
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all by itself. Alternatively,
Use synonyms
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
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 in a particular country
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 still
survive
Correct subject-verb agreement
survives
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 to overcome the environmental
issue
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,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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propose to have an international
organization
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 which
allow
Correct subject-verb agreement
allows
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 other
countries
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 to join in to enable the
society
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have
Fix the infinitive
to have
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the
Correct article usage
an
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awareness
Replace the word
aware
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 of
Use synonyms
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 and make
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 big campaign as we know nowadays
such
Linking Words
 as WWF (World wide fund nature) since having participation with
international
Add an article
the international
an international
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organization
Use synonyms
,
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government
Add an article
the government
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 would get the more
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
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 as the
organization
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 could influence the attention from
society
Use synonyms
To sum up
Linking Words
, I contend that it has a big opportunity to protect the
environment
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 if
government
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have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
collaboration with other
countries
Use synonyms
 to address the
issue
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 by joining the international
organization
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 WWF
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 would attract followers to be engaged.
Submitted by farel2300 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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