Some people think that government should not give international aid since they have disadvantages people like unemployment and homeless in their own country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Global relationships should be needed for any kind of help and development. In
this
,case the international connection will be strong and our humanitarian and goodwill will be getting value for any kind of natural disaster and economic help. On my ,side I totally disagree about
this
statement.
Firstly
, I want to say that; without ,support you cannot survive in any place. We are dependable on others,
this
is a very natural thing.
For example
, very recently we faced the whole world covered by corona disease. Huge people have died without treatment and mental support. Our
neighbour
Replace the word
neighbouring
show examples
countries were affected by covid-19 for that reason huge people died and stayed at home without treatment. At
this
time our country's government give medical
as well as
mental support to the affected patients.
Secondly
, without economic and industrial ,help you cannot move for
further
steps. Some developing communities are seeking help from developed states. In Bangladesh, we are developing in every area like transportation, civilization and others. For the recent example, of Padma Bridge; we had taken help from 2 countries
this
is China and Korea. Both regions helped with
this
implementation and final execution. After connecting both cities
this
south side of Bangladesh will improve day by day. And
this
connection of bridge will ennoble modern civilization and employment growth as well. In conclusion, global relationship it is important for future development and they cannot be
able
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
without any transition like the economy, medical facility and others.
Submitted by nuresadikchowdhury175 on

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task response
Task Response: The essay presents relevant points but lacks a clear position on the prompt. It is important to clearly state whether you agree or disagree and to provide a balanced argument.
coherence
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a logical structure and presents supported main points. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more clearly presented to provide a stronger framework for the essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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