Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age.

Formal
education
plays an important role in developing personality. It is often thought that formal
education
should start at
early
Correct article usage
the early
show examples
stages of a child's
life
while
others believe that it is not necessary till the age of six or seven
years
.
This
essay will discuss why early formal
education
is more important and has its own benefits
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
starting later in
life
. Early schooling is thought beneficial and compulsory in
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
countries. Children have sharper picking and learning power as compared to adult or
grown up
Add a hyphen
grown-up
show examples
children. Starting proper learning at
early
Add an article
an early
show examples
stage helps them to develop basic and other skills better
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
those who start late.
Lets
Replace the word
Let's
Let us
show examples
take
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
example of Pakistan, here formal
education
starts between three to four
years
old and by the age of 22 to 23 a student graduates to start his/her career. On the other side, few countries start schooling at the age of 6 to 7
years
. Before turning 7, children play and learn basic
life
skills and manners. They are not forced to learn anything in books. They can learn once they are turned 7
years
old.
In Addition
late starters do not have to bear the pressure on their minds as they have grown up a bit. As
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
in
Russia
Add a comma
,Russia
show examples
my nephew started his proper
education
when he turned 7 and
half
Correct article usage
a half
show examples
years
old. Prior to
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
he was taking part in fun and learning activities only. In conclusion,
join
Wrong verb form
joining
show examples
proper institutes helps them learn more quickly and they have
better
Add an article
a better
the better
show examples
tendency of remembering anything.
Moreover
, they have more time in future to learn many things as they have started early in their
life
.
Submitted by mic.jan.thomas on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: