Some people believe that it is important to spend a lot of money on family celebrations while others think it is a waste of money. Discuss both views. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Much
money
is used for family occasions because it
a
Add a missing verb
is a
show examples
major opinion by lots of people and some believe it
extravagant
Add a missing verb
is extravagant
show examples
spending.
This
essay will explain the extent of
debt
some indulge in,
also
causing depression and jealousy. Most family
occasion
Fix the agreement mistake
occasions
show examples
organized in
this
part of the world are very competitive, so many indulge themselves in
debt
by taking load in other not to be left behind in the family and
at the end
of the
occasion
they start thinking of how to pay
debt
Add an article
the debt
show examples
.
Example
Add an article
An example
show examples
is a societal Wedding ceremony of a friend I attended
last
month, it was a
serve yourself
Add a hyphen
serve-yourself
show examples
gathering where you can eat any food you want because varieties were made available in surplus. After the wedding
ceremony
Add a comma
,ceremony
show examples
everyone departed to their various destinations. Just
last
week I called my friend to ask
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
her well-being, she picked
my
Change preposition
up my
show examples
call and started crying so I begin wondering what could be the issue that
it's
Wrong verb form
it was
show examples
too early, only for her to say
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
show examples
was a Bank loan that was taken to
used
Change the form of the verb
use
show examples
for their wedding ceremony.
Secondly
, Most people who couldn't meet up with the competition stuff become depressed and jealous thereby creating unnecessary enemies within the family.
Elder
Correct article usage
The elder
show examples
brother
wondering
Wrong verb form
wonders
show examples
why the kid
brother
can't help them when they were in need of
money
if he has the kind of
money
he spent in the family
occasion
they just finished.
Example
Add an article
An example
show examples
is a film I watched where the kid
brother
spend extravagantly
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
their
uncle
Change noun form
uncle's
show examples
coronation and the elder
brother
was angry that when he was in the hospital the kid
brother
didn't send him
money
and now see the way he spent so much. In conclusion, the opinion of
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of people on spending
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
money
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
family
occasion
Fix the agreement mistake
occasions
show examples
as
major
Correct article usage
a major
show examples
thing is not an idea I key into because it makes some indulge in
debt
and causes depression and jealousy in
family
Add an article
the family
show examples
.
Submitted by oludayotemilade on

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Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cherish
  • nurture
  • strengthen
  • bond
  • create memories
  • enjoyment
  • sense of belonging
  • reconnect
  • unite
  • traditions
  • create traditions
  • financial burden
  • priorities
  • moderation
  • budget
  • frugal
  • extravagant
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