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Band 4.5

Most people agree that money cannot buy happiness. Why is happiness difficult to define? How can people achieve happiness?

#people #money #happiness
Nowadays, there are a considerable amount of people who believe that money
increase
Change the verb form
increases
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 happiness. The following essay takes a look at some ways to become happy. Everyone has values and priorities in their lives , and they are all different.
For instance
, buying
a new cosmetic products
Correct the article-noun agreement
new cosmetic products
a new cosmetic product
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 can make girls smile , or a new dress.
However
, boys are not interested in it , and only
purchase
Correct article usage
the purchase
show examples
 of new watches or car accessories can make them happy. You can make someone’s entire week by giving a compliment .
Furthermore
,someone might not like the expensive gift, but the fact that it is a gift from the heart can please them.
However
, happiness is a multifaceted concept. We all want to live like someone famous or rich , but no one knows what’s hidden under their masks. Maybe we have something that they don’t have? Or maybe they want a life just like ours? It is wrong to devalue our lives
looking
Change preposition
by looking
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 for someone else’s life. It is said that «Be happy not because everything is good but because you can see the good in everything» . There are people who by themselves are always happy , that just enjoy the present moment and feel happy. From the given arguments and examples , every person has his own concept of what happiness is, so it is not possible to say exactly how to become happy.
Submitted by happy01.uk on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • subjective
  • universally
  • cultural differences
  • psychological factors
  • satisfaction with life
  • emotional balance
  • personal achievements
  • social connections
  • fulfilling relationships
  • sense of belonging
  • sense of purpose
  • physical health
  • well-being
  • financial stability
  • mindfulness
  • gratitude
  • positive thinking
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