Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People today spend too much time on personal interests, and not enough time on more serious duties and obligations. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

First of all, people should earn enough money to support their lives by completing serious duties, before they can spend time on personal
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
. As stated by Maslow, we can only achieve
self actualization
Add a hyphen
self-actualization
show examples
after our basic needs are fulfilled.
For example
, opening up a coffee shop has always been my friend’s dream,yet after investigating the price of the coffee beans, stores and all the equipment, she realizes
that is
too much of a burden for her.
Therefore
, she decides to postpone her dream until she finishes her studies and saves up enough money.
Overall
, we should stabilize our financial situation by completing obligations,
such
as studies and work, so that dreams of personal interest can be fulfilled.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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