IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smartphones, more and more people are starting to work from home. What are the advantages and disadvantages for this development?

#people #travel #place #work #computers #internet #smartphones #home #development
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Technology has improved significantly in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people’s
life
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lives
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 and the way they
work
Use synonyms
 recently. Up to now, people would travel to their place of
work
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.
Although
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, nowadays with Smartphones and
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
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 working has become
more and more easy
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easier and easier
easier
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. My own view is these technologies have more benefits than drawbacks. I will discuss both the positive and negative aspects of distance
work
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. On the one hand, distance
work
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allow
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allows
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 workers
have
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to have
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 more personal space and liberty. Since
,
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 employees do not have any obligation, they do not have to transform a lot.
Also
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, by using these electronic components workers can be available for 24 hours.
Moreover
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, the capability of managing their own day will give people a chance to plan
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 personal life outside of business.
On the other hand
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,
these digital equipment
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this digital equipment
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 can limit actual communication between co-workers.
Due to
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 online interactions, colleagues do not need actual communication.
As a result
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,
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
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 of communication can
effect
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affect
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on
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apply
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thier
Correct your spelling
their
 mental health.
For
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this
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 reason, some companies introduce mental health care services.
To conclude
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,
although
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,
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apply
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 distance
work
Use synonyms
 has drawbacks, I believe working from home has many positive aspects
such
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 as saving time and liberty.
Submitted by javadsaady1992 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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