The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during 

the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the 

result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit,

during the same two periods. 

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and 

make comparisons where relevant.
The pie charts and the table give
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about the number of Ashdown
Museum
guests in the
year
before and the
year
after it was renovated and the results of surveys from
respondent
Fix the agreement mistake
respondents
show examples
to measure their
satisfied
Replace the word
satisfaction
show examples
when visiting the
museum
.
Overall
, the renovated
museum
was 20% more satisfied than before being refurbished which attracted 18,000 more visitors. First of all, the number of
visitant
Change to a plural noun
visitants
show examples
to Ashdown
Museum
showed 74,000 people in the
year
before upgrading the design
then
after the restoration was finished it derived considerably higher visitors which obtained 92,000 people.
In addition
, before
museum
Correct article usage
the museum
show examples
being
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
modernization
Replace the word
modernised
show examples
, the pie chart showed 40%
guest
Change preposition
of guest
show examples
was dissatisfied and satisfied in the
year
after took place of dissatisfied which was the largest percentage and
dissatisfied
Replace the word
dissatisfaction
show examples
lessened to 15%.
In addition
, very dissatisfied declined to 5%. Notwithstanding very satisfied rose
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
20% to 35%, there was still the same amount of no response to the survey at 5%.
Submitted by farel2300 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words museum, year with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • refurbishment
  • visitor numbers
  • satisfaction levels
  • very satisfied
  • satisfied
  • neither satisfied nor dissatisfied
  • dissatisfied
  • very dissatisfied
  • survey results
  • comparison
  • impact
  • effectiveness
  • visitor experience
  • overall improvement
  • increase/decrease in visitors
  • positive feedback
  • negative feedback
  • visitor survey
  • survey period
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