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In a new town, parks and sports center are more important than a shopping center. Do you agree or disagree

#town #parks #sports #center
some argue that constructing sparks and sports facilities should be a priority over shopping in a new
town
 to meet the recreational needs of dwellers. In my opinion, a balance both of options will be advantageous, not only for
residents
' health but
also
 to boost the growth financial of several countries. On the one hand, it is undeniable that shopping malls generate significant revenue for a new
town
, they can create more job opportunities for
residents
, and contribute to the tax revenue, which is indispensable in funding infrastructure.
for example
, Bangkok has become a famous shopping destination, where people can flock to purchase numerous high-quality goods that are not too expensive.
Therefore
, If sports and parks are priority over shopping it does not generate revenue for a new
town
.
On the other hand
,
although
 the growth of the economy is crucial to a new
town
. I propose that the state should allocate financial resources to build more facilities by means of free charge,
this
 can encourage
residents
 to participate in numerous physical activities, that can help enhance local people's physical and mental health.
thus
 can create a
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
 environment for them to have a better living standard.
In addition
, those destinations can attract tourists, contributing to the income
a
Change preposition
of a
show examples
new
town
. In conclusion, I believe that the combination between parks, sports, and shopping malls
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will
cate
Correct your spelling
cater
show examples
 to the demands of inhabitants.
while
 the former is crucial in the growth of the financial, the latter can help
residents
 boost their health
Submitted by nguyenhoanganh64195123 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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