Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unneccessary or even negative. Discuss the possible arguments on both sides, and say which side you personally support.
Nowadays, one of the most social relates to family life.
While
it is widely believed that kids should spend all of their leisure time
with their family
. Others believe it is useless and Fix the agreement mistake
families
disadvantages
. In my opinion,
On the one hand, Add a missing verb
has disadvantages
children
need to be with their family Change noun form
children's
are
essential. The main reason is that we can contribute and penetrate each other through communication and activity, And from that, we might become united and easily Correct subject-verb agreement
is
to
find their strength or weakness to improve which is very Fix the infinitive
apply
nessesary
in our life, so we can gain more Correct your spelling
necessary
self-confident
and expand experiences . Another reason is that Replace the word
self-confidence
children
can stay away from the
mobile devices , Correct article usage
apply
improve
realistic skills. By the report confirmed by New York Times in 2020, Correct word choice
and improve
children
who used much of their time
with family are possibly get
more happiness and Change the verb form
are possibly getting
successful
in their life than the others
Replace the word
success
On the other hand
, real situation
show us a desperate view that Fix the agreement mistake
situations
children
ain't expect to used
much of Change the form of the verb
use
time
with family. It is Correct pronoun usage
their time
due to
the fact that the distance of
2 generations is very large both in logic and action. And Change preposition
between
consequences
are Correct article usage
the consequences
children
ain't be mild to talk with their parents so it
make Correct pronoun usage
apply
a
communication become useless and unpredictable. So Remove the article
apply
in
some Change preposition
from
of
Change preposition
apply
perspective
, Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
children
prefer to spend their free time
with friends and video games which generally can provide them more
interesting and inspiring Change preposition
with more
instead
of
family. In Change preposition
than
fact
these thought is definitely make sense and suitable for today , Add a comma
,fact
children
can develop independently , has a lot of relationship and many practical skills.
In conclusion, it is needed to spend some of their time
to
Change preposition
with
family
because you can become more mature and Add an article
the family
a family
flexibility
. Replace the word
flexible
While
go outside and face with the new mysterious world is also
addictive and challengingSubmitted by yeshomeclass on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!