The graph below shows the population of particular country by age group starting in 1960 and including a forecast to 2040.

#population #country #age #group #forecast

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The line graph illustrates information about the comparison proportion of the

population

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, in three different

age

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groups percentage-wise from 1960 including a forecast for 2040.

Overall

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, at the beginning of the

period

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, the

population

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of those aged 15-64 were the largest percentage of the

population

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all recorded and predicted.

While

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, those aged 65 and over increase during the

period

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In contrast

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, the percentages of those aged 0-14 remind decreased during the

period

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. The

age

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group 15-64 accounted for the greatest of the

population

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during the beginning

period

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and experienced a slight fall of 5% after a 60-year

period

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Furthermore

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, a number of

age

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groups 0-14 comprised the second largest

population

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in 1960.

However

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, those experienced decline dramatically of about 10% in 2020.

In contrast

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, those aged 65 and over contributed the lowest of the

population

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just over 15% in 1960 and experienced a more than doubled increase to nearly one-third in 2020.

In addition

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, in The forecast for 2020 and 2040, the 15-64

age

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group trend continued a slight fall of 14% of the total

population

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in 2040,Those aged 0-14 experienced an of 10% in 2040.

Conversely

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, the total of

population

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elder (65+) is projected to increase and equal of the sum those aged group 15-64 in 2040.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Sat May 13 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in contrast".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, age, period with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

206 words

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The graph below shows the population of particular country by age group starting in 1960 and including a forecast to 2040.

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smart phones, more and more people are starting to work from home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Some people say that subjects like arts, music, drama and creative writing are more beneficial to children and therefore they need more of these subjects to be included in the timetable. Do you agree or disagree?

Today, people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that testing on animals is necessary for discovering medicine that helps fight diseases, while others believe it is not necessary to test on animals for this reason. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the best way to succeed is to get a university education, while others disagree and say that it is no longer true nowadays. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.