An increasing number of larger shopping malls, areas and departmental stores are leading to the decline number of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages

In
this
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modern era, a rising ratio of shopping centres,
malls
Use synonyms
and departments is forwarding to the reduced
number
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of small shops. In my opinion, there are numerous merits of the increasing
number
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of mega
malls
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. I will discuss the merits and demerits of hiking the
number
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of developed businesses in the
impending
Correct word choice
following
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paragraphs.
To begin
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with, the advantage of the above statement is that larger shopping centres can save the time of their consumers. First and foremost,
malls
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provide a range of products
such
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as shoes, bags and groceries under one roof.
As individuals
Correct word choice
Individuals
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do not need to go to various shops
for purchasing
Change preposition
to purchase
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different things.
Moreover
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, it provides good quality products. The reason for
this
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is that big
malls
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also
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use good raw materials to make products.
Consequently
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, individuals can not only save their time but
also
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they can save their money.
Hence
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, it is apparent why many are in favour of big
malls
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.
On the other hand
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, the drawbacks of the declining
number
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of small stores can create unemployment. If big businesses are opened in local areas, everyone might prefer to purchase things from
malls
Use synonyms
.
As small
Correct word choice
Small
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shoppers are forced to close their small businesses by big organisations.
Thus
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, everyone
does work
Wrong verb form
works
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to earn money, and shops can not only face unemployment but
also
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they can suffer from stress, anxiety and depression.
As a result
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, small shoppers are unable to complete their basic requirements
such
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as food, clothing and shelter. In view of the arguments
outlines
Wrong verb form
outlined
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above, one can conclude that the benefits of
rising
Verb problem
growing
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larger shopping centres are indeed too great to ignore.

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and try to avoid repetition.
grammatical range
Work on your sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
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