many manufactured food and drink product contain high level of sugar, which causes many health problem. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #product #level #sugar #health #products #people

It is said that foods and beverages which include carbohydrates should become more expensive so which decreases people's consumption as they are harmful to the body. Admittedly I completely agree with

this

idea

due to

reasons which will be elaborated on in

this

essay.

to begin

with,

sugar

is a cheap ingredient for making a product so product made of carbohydrate is affordable for many people to buy as snacks.

This

will result in more

sugar

consumption which may result in a dramatic increase in diabetes in society. By making sugary

products

more expensive, individuals take alternatives into consideration. Another benefit of launching

such

a scheme is that by making

products

containing

sugar

, pupils in school will be more productive.

Although

it may seem irrelevant, there are researches showing that consuming mal nutritious foods like

products

comprised of

sugar

will result in poor performance of children in school. An increase in the price of sugary

products

such

as candies and chocolates forces children to buy nutritious snacks like nuts. In conclusion, policies which make sugary

products

more expensive have numerous benefits for society. The most obvious one is improving general health and making children more concentrated in school.

Submitted by amirghas92 on Sun May 14 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

198 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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many manufactured food and drink product contain high level of sugar, which causes many health problem. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that success in life comes from ard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicuss both views and give your opinion

Nowadays, most children prefer to spend several hours playing with electronic devices over doing more traditional leisure activities. What problem does this cause? What do you think are possible solutions?

People are now living longer than before, an aging population means that there are more elderly people than ever. Many people are calling for the building of more geriatric homes while others oppose the idea. Give the advantages and disadvantages of building more geriatric homes for the elderly.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people in the music business feel that illegal music sites on the internet are a serious threat to the industry and more should be done to prevent them from operating. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?