Companies should encourage emplooyes who work in a high position to leave at the age of 55 in order to give opportinities to the new generation.To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#companies #emplooyes #work #position #age #opportinities #generation

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business

Correct article usage

the business

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ecosystem, there is a notion that altering employees, specifically for old workers who have

position

Fix the agreement mistake

positions

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Change preposition

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top

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the top

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manager level is required. From my consideration, I advocate that the earlier occasion is extremely necessary as a way to release

chances

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changes

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to the new employees which will be detailed in the following paragraphs. In the beginning, regeneration should be implemented in numerous business sectors in order to decrease

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the unemployee

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unemployee

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unemployed

ratio which is constructed by educated people.

For example

, several job vacancies in Indonesia have participated in the earlier activity to make sure that

new comers

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newcomers

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like fresh

graduate

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graduates

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will have profession.

Consequently

, pre-adult people who have exceptional academic backgrounds can have jobs as a way to decline the previous ratio.

Furthermore

, rejuvenation is needed to be implemented

due to

youngsters may have fresh

idea

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ideas

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to boost office productivity. Based on some social studies,

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the millenial

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millenial

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millennials

and Z

generation

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generations

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are radiated by technologies from

early

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an early

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which can escalate their probabilities to solve recent challenges which exist in the companies in the middle of advanced innovation at

this

moment.

As a result

, replacing boomer workers who have more than 55 years old can assist corporations to adapt well during

this

era.

For instance

, multitudinous start-up parties will hire young applicants to make their companies survive nowadays.

To conclude

, I redeclare my position that superseding old

staffs

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staff

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with young candidates is indispensable to be applied. As plausible reasons, it can decrease

proportion

Add an article

the proportion

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of educated people who do not have jobs and numerous companies can be more adaptive

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show examples

this

era.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Sun May 14 2023

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8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
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17
Grammar mistakes
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Companies should encourage emplooyes who work in a high position to leave at the age of 55 in order to give opportinities to the new generation.To what extend do you agree or disagree?

People find it very difficult to speak in public or to give a presentation before an audience. Do you think public speaking skill is really important? Give reasons. Some people say public speaking should be taught at school. Do you agree or disagree?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The continued rise in the world’s population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present times. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers. Others think that it is dependent on the attitude of the students. Discuss both of the views and give your opinion.