IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to increase the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that costumers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #manufacturers #supermarkets #responsibility #amount #goods #costumers
In
this
 contemporary epoch,
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 paying
attantion
Correct your spelling
attention
 more to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hygiene than
any
Change preposition
at any
show examples
 other time
of
Change preposition
apply
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period
due to
 some rising infectious
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
. So a group of people claim that markets and production
componies
Correct your spelling
companies
 of
grociery
Correct your spelling
grocery
 must increase their packaging,
while
 others believe that clients should avoid
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overpackaged goods. The following essay will aim at outlining both sides,
then
 my personal opinion.
To begin
 with, nowadays it is undeniable that there are rising
planty
Correct your spelling
plenty
 of infectious
disease
Change the noun form
diseases
show examples
,
such
 as Covid-19, and individuals
argueing
Correct your spelling
arguing
 that the packaging of goods should be increased.
However
Add a comma
,However
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 it is a huge damage
for
Change preposition
to
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 the environment. To
eloborate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
, packages for good are mostly made from paper, or some type of plastic, and we know that all papers come from trees, so that, deforestation is the main predominant reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 global warming.
Moreover
, there will be
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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 simultaneously with packaging,
also
 pollution.
Although
 increasing packaging may prevent some kind of minor disease, it will be huge harm
for
Change preposition
to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature.
By
Change preposition
In
show examples
 contrast
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 those people, some individuals claim that folk should avoid
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overpackaging. Overpackaging doesn't mean that the spreading of
invectious
Correct your spelling
infectious
 is prevented. In detail, there are exceedingly few illnesses
may
Correct pronoun usage
that may
show examples
 harm
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
mankind from less packaging, and many other serious
desease
Correct your spelling
diseases
disease
 come from
another things
Replace the adjective
another thing
other things
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,
such
 as from blood or air. So just increasing packaging will be just nonsense,but
huge
Add an article
a huge
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 disaster for
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
. As an example all fast food cafes getting used to all thing
to package
Change the verb form
packaged
show examples
, and many of these packages are just waste, and they
doesn't
Change the verb form
don't
show examples
 improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hygiene. So
instead
 of increasing packaging, they should be decreased. In conclusion, both sides cited some
relevent
Correct your spelling
relevant
 examples.
However
, my personal position is that since we should take care of
invironment
Correct your spelling
environment
, the packaging must be decreased.
Submitted by nadimanasimova on

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