IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many manufacturd food and drink products contain high levels of sugar which causes many health problems,sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar Do you agree or disagree

This
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 paper will discuss both of positive and negative effects of increasing the price of some
sugar
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products
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, which prevents individuals from abusing
products
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. In
this
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 way, being aware of the amount of
sugar
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 held in
food
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 and drink by massive
food
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 industries is
too
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a too
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 important issue.in my opinion, I certainly believe that we need to manage
this
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 universal health problem by increasing the unhealthy
products
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 cost.
Firstly
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, we have to be aware that sweets
products
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 with a high range of
sugar
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 are a good reason for lots of illnesses
such
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 as cardiovascular. So, governments have to encourage societies to learn how they can maintain their healthy
lifestyle
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 through useful education.
For instance
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, we know that the new generation's tendency is fast-
food
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 ,especially at school.
Therefore
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, teachers and parents have to encourage them to do physical activities more than others. So, either they can burn more calories or learn healthy
lifestyle
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 methods.
Secondly
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, the government have to manage the
use
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 of unhealthy
food
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 by increasing the price of
sugar
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products
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.after that,
people
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 automatically tend to
use
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 healthy
food
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 like vegetables.
This
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 method could affect youth more and older
people
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 because not only do they have less income than others but
also
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 they tend to consume high-
sugar
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products
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. So, logical laws
such
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 as extra tax for unhealthy
products
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 would encourage societies to change their
lifestyle
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 routes.
For example
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, the Spain government has increased the price of tobacco each year. After that date, the number of
people
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 who
use
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 the cigarette is been decreased. Because
,
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apply
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 a big part of
people
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 who tend to smoke decided to put it down. In conclusion, the government have to aware societies of using
sugar
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products
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 and encourage them to do physical activities ,especially at schools. In the same way, increasing the cost of
sugar
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products
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 is so important. Because
,
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apply
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 it can prevent to
use
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 of unhealthy
food
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 and encourage them to change their
lifestyle
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.

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