IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

International travel has many advantages to both travellers and the country that they visited. Do advantages outhweigh the disadvantages?

#travel #travellers #country #outhweigh
I guess, It has a lot of advantages,For ,example Im a Philippine passport holder.The big advantage for us is that we can travel to 33 countries without visiting,just to have a complete document required,
for
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
show examples
 plane ticket hotel booking and bank account some other requirements are needed,my opinion as a traveller I can go to other places and see how their country revolve to
this
 modern era,their culture and way of leaving,taste the different kinds of dishes eat some fruits that are rare in our place,hear the different languages of the locals and watch some theatre interpreting their past cultures and if ever
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 got
luck
Replace the word
lucky
show examples
 maybe
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 can attend special occasion most of them celebrate at street using different banner's and having a parade. In my opinion,travelling can help my country uplift its economic status.Early booking to your target destination offers a lot of discounts and freebies just simple
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays there is online ticketing and booking so easy to reach out without
hassle
Correct article usage
the hassle
show examples
going
Change preposition
of going
show examples
 to their offices and
also
 some online agencies that are available offers and can accommodate or help you to manage your booking
although
 it cost a little the point is you can ask them and they do all the thing that you need to travel. I concluded and I encourage some
netizen
Fix the agreement mistake
netizens
show examples
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 are retired to spend
some place
Correct your spelling
someplace
show examples
 where
they
Add the auxiliary verb
havethey
show examples
 never been at least they will enjoy the fruit of their hardship.
Submitted by katelantano on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: