some people think that activities during the free-time should be planned while others disagree. Discuss both sides and include examples and relevant data from your own experience.

The issue of planning free
time
has turned into a controversial topic in
this
century. In
this
way, some people believe that planning for sports in
free
Correct pronoun usage
their free
show examples
time
is necessary
while
others have accepted that planning for activities is not important. Personally, I agree with the second group. In the following paragraphs, my points of view will be explained in detail. First and foremost, no one can ever deny the significance of exercise nowadays. In
this
way, there is a growing tendency among the people who want a healthier
life
.
In addition
,
according to
the latest figures released by government authorities, the rate of obesity in cities is sharply increasing which is related to hectic lifestyles .
In other words
, the majority of people do not have enough exercise. From
this
perspective, the government authorities usually tackle the issue by making policies by urban design and urban planning to create public parks and
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
zones. To put it simply, planning for sports in free
time
is a must for each person to prevent many types of diseases. Some might believe that activities do not have a significant role in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Furthermore
,
This
attitude might contribute to
growth
Add an article
the growth
show examples
of diseases,
for instance
, mental disorders and high blood pressure and so on and so forth. It is of utmost importance to say they forget the priority of activities in society. To summarize, I feel in
this
century, it is widely accepted that
workout
Fix the agreement mistake
workouts
show examples
and
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
have a significant role in our
life
. To clarify more, focusing on planning and exercising in free
time
can contribute to having a healthier
life
.
Submitted by kambiz.pirzad on

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task response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses the prompt and fully discusses both sides of the issue.
coherence cohesion
Organize the essay in a more coherent and cohesive manner to improve the flow of ideas and logical progression.

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