some people think that activities during the free-time should be planned while others disagree. Discuss both sides and include examples and relevant data from your own experience.

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The issue of planning free
time
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has turned into a controversial topic in
this
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century. In
this
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way, some people believe that planning for sports in
free
Correct pronoun usage
their free
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time
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is necessary
while
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others have accepted that planning for activities is not important. Personally, I agree with the second group. In the following paragraphs, my points of view will be explained in detail. First and foremost, no one can ever deny the significance of exercise nowadays. In
this
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way, there is a growing tendency among the people who want a healthier
life
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.
In addition
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,
according to
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the latest figures released by government authorities, the rate of obesity in cities is sharply increasing which is related to hectic lifestyles .
In other words
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, the majority of people do not have enough exercise. From
this
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perspective, the government authorities usually tackle the issue by making policies by urban design and urban planning to create public parks and
sport
Change the noun form
sports
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zones. To put it simply, planning for sports in free
time
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is a must for each person to prevent many types of diseases. Some might believe that activities do not have a significant role in our
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
Furthermore
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,
This
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attitude might contribute to
growth
Add an article
the growth
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of diseases,
for instance
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, mental disorders and high blood pressure and so on and so forth. It is of utmost importance to say they forget the priority of activities in society. To summarize, I feel in
this
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century, it is widely accepted that
workout
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workouts
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and
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
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have a significant role in our
life
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. To clarify more, focusing on planning and exercising in free
time
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can contribute to having a healthier
life
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.

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task response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses the prompt and fully discusses both sides of the issue.
coherence cohesion
Organize the essay in a more coherent and cohesive manner to improve the flow of ideas and logical progression.
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