IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #cities #face #life #government #move #towns
Living in big
cities
also
 has
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
many challenges that
people
 encounter in their daily lives.
Overpopulation
 and environmental
pollution
 are two basic problems which
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
 living in large
cities
 very challenging.
This
 essay will discuss problems faced by
people
 living in big
cities
 and explain why the
government
 should support immigration to regional towns. Over the years,
overpopulation
 has been a common challenge for residents in major
cities
.
Due to
 the large number of
people
, road traffic is very rampant.
For example
,
people
 would prefer to buy cars for their private use than
making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 use of any public
transportaion
Correct your spelling
transportation
 means as they feel it is more convenient;
this
 creates room for more cars on the road,
thus
, causing road traffic.
Overpopulation
 is
infact
Correct your spelling
in fact
 a major concern for the
government
.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, environmental
pollution
 is another disadvantage of living in a large city. It is highly disturbing as it generates lots of health disturbing challenges. For
instant
Add an article
an instant
show examples
, 67% of lung infections resulted from air
pollution
 and most high blood pressure emanated from sudden noise
pollution
.
Pollution
 is so critical a problem that strategies to totally eliminate it in the past
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 failed.
However
,
overpopulation
 and environmental
pollution
 can be controlled if the
government
 support
people
 to relocate to regional areas.
Additionally
, the
government
 should create opportunities for low taxing to enable
indiduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
mortgage
Fix the infinitive
to mortgage
show examples
 houses in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 most convenient way.
This
 will easily attract
people
 to embrace life in regional areas.
This
 will
also
 be advantageous to the environment as it will save areas that are fast declining from lack of human presence.
Submitted by ksvid49 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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