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Writing Samples
Band 5

Social media is becoming more and more trandy today, what are the advantages and disadvantages of using social media?

#media #trandy
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It is indeed true that nowadays
people
Use synonyms
 mostly kill their spare time on social
media
Use synonyms
 as it is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
 resource
of
Change preposition
for
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 entertainment and Education as well .
Nonetheless
Linking Words
 , some
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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become addicted and stay away from
the
Change the word
their
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
 which is very hard to ignore . In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
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i
Change the capitalization
I
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 shall explain the merits and demerits of
this
Linking Words
 trend. To commence with the first and foremost point
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
 way to
enhances
Wrong verb form
enhance
show examples
 the knowledge of international and national news
while
Linking Words
 sitting at home .Needless to say ,
due to
Linking Words
advancement
Correct article usage
the advancement
show examples
 of technology
people
Use synonyms
 can upload every single news on their mobile phone with the help
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Correct your spelling
Internet
show examples
 and by
this
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 can stay alert and aware
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
current issues .
Moreover
Linking Words
 , in
this
Linking Words
 modern
ear
Correct your spelling
era
show examples
,
people
Use synonyms
 can earn
handsome
Add an article
a handsome
show examples
 payout for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 by
share
Change the verb form
sharing
show examples
 their talent videos on
instagram
Change the capitalization
Instagram
show examples
 and other social applications .
Depite
Correct your spelling
Despite
 these benefits , there are ample drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
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modren
Correct your spelling
modern
 technology .
Firstly
Linking Words
 ,
people
Use synonyms
are usually give
Change the verb form
are usually given
are usually giving
show examples
 more preferences to watch and play video games rather than spending time with
parents
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 and friends.
As a result
Linking Words
, the bond becomes weak and
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
 usually stay away from their
parents
Use synonyms
 . Meanwhile , children
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 their social and communication
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 as they busy
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 social applications
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 , when individuals become addicted
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 things
then
Linking Words
 they normally forget to take their meals on time .
Consequencesly
Correct your spelling
Consequently
Consequences
, they faced many health problems ,like obesity.
To conclude
Linking Words
,I would like to restate ,
although
Linking Words
 social
media
Use synonyms
 is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
 way to earn money and get
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
 to learn about other
nations
Change noun form
nations'
nation's
show examples
 news ,
however
Linking Words
 as
people
Use synonyms
 become addicted and stay separate from
the
Change the word
their
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 totally wrong for new generations
Submitted by kirandkaur131 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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