The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in Canada in 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words. (20 mins.)
The pie charts illustrate 4 different retail sectors in online shopping in Canada between 2005 and 2010.
The first
sector
is Electronics and Appliances which the
major purchasing in both 2005 and 2010 around one-third. Add a missing verb
was the
In addition
, there was 35 percent
in 2005 but it decreased 5 percent
in 2010. Next
Correct article usage
The next
sector
, Food and Beverage, was 22 percent
in 2005 and increased 10
Change preposition
to 10
percent
after 5 years. The third sector
is Home Furnishings, which significantly decreased also
10 percent
between 2005 and 2010, from 25 percent
to 15 percent
. The last
sector
, Video Games was
slightly rose 5 Unnecessary verb
apply
percent
from 18 to 23 percent
.
In conclusion, as you can see, there were two sectors ( Electronics and Appliances, and Video Games) converting 5 percent
. Change the spelling
per cent
Similarly
to
Home Furnishings and Food and Beverage were Change preposition
apply
also
converting 10 percent
to each other.Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sector, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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