IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The graph and chart give information about the migration to the UK between 2000 and 2008. The line graph shows the intended length of stay of immigrants. The pie chart shows the reasons for migration to the UK in 2008.

The graph and chart give information about the migration to the UK between 2000 and 2008. The line graph shows the intended length of stay of immigrants. The pie chart shows the reasons for migration to the UK in 2008.
#information #migration #uk #line #length #immigrants
The compare charts depict information about how long immigrants intended to stay and
cause
Correct article usage
the cause
show examples
 for shifting to the United Kingdom from 2001 to 2008.
Overall
, the highest number of visitors stayed in the UK for up to two
years
,
whereas
 the lowest was for four to six
years
.
Also
, the prominent
reason
 for
visited
Wrong verb form
visiting
show examples
 for work and the less giving accompany to family and without any particular
reason
. In the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2001, just above 1,50,000
people
 stayed in England for
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 2
years
, 1,00,000 for two to four
years
 and almost 50,000
people
 live there for four to six
years
. After 2
years
, the tourists have more interested to
stayed
Change the form of the verb
stay
show examples
 in Britain for 2
years
 which was recorded for
near
Change the word
nearly
show examples
 about 2,30,000 and the other two categories
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 levelled-off until
last
 year,
while
 2
years
 of visitors followed an upward trend till in 2008 which was accounted for nearly 2,60,000. Moving
further
, the main
reason
 for migration to
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 for work purposes that was constituted 38% and 7% of the individuals who moved to
this
 continent for personal reasons.
In contrast
, 7%
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 went to England for no specific
reason
. The proportion of
people
 who stayed there for the academic field was 32% and 16% reached for meet with their parents.
Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words years, reason, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: