The diagram shoes the process by which milk and related products are produced. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

#shoes #process #milk #products #summarise #information #features

The diagram illustrates how

diary

Correct your spelling

dairy

show examples

products

are processed, produced, packaged and sold in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

supermarkets and shops for our consumption.

Overall

according to

the

diagram

Add a comma

,diagram

show examples

there are eight stages, beginning with cows grazing on

Remove the article

apply

show examples

farm land

Correct your spelling

farmland

show examples

and ending in the sales of the

products

Milk

is been extracted from the cows with the use of a milking machine twice a day, and

then

stored in the refrigerator for a

while

. The refrigerated

milk

is been transported through a tanker to the

refininery

Correct your spelling

refinery

. More

diary

Correct your spelling

dairy

show examples

products

are been produced

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

cheese, cream, butter and

milk

. The

milk

then

pasteurised and packaged into containers. The packaged

products

are sent to different shops and supermarkets for purchase and human consumption.

Submitted by oludayotemilade on Mon May 22 2023

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words products, milk with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

120 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram shoes the process by which milk and related products are produced. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

Some people think that students in single-sex schools perform better academically. Others, however, believe that mixed schools provide children with better social skills for adult life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You recently went on a trip with a friend and you both took some photographs. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: * Ask your friend to send you a particular photograph * Explain why you need that particular photograph * Tell your friend what happened to your copy of it

Many people say that the only way to guarantee to get a good job is to complete a course in university education. Other claims that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. How far do you agree or disagree with the above views?

Some people think that men are naturally more competitive than women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, international tourism has become an important source of income. However, it also has negative effects. Do the benefits of international tourism outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.