The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

The given map compares changes which took place in Grange Park from 1920 to now.

Overall

, from the figure, it can be seen that there have been many changes here since 1920 as most of the places have been modified, renovated and most places have been replaced.

To begin

with, the fountain was located at the centre of the garden which has been replaced by the rose garden with seats surrounding it. And

also

there were a rose garden and pond of water plant in the northwest of the map

as well as

a café and children’s play area constructed

instead

of them.

Moreover

, the stage for musicians and two seats have been removed and an amphitheatre has been added to host the concerts.

Finally

, the glasshouse and seats have been changed with a water feature, and the underground park has been newly added to the southeast side corner.

Submitted by iielts998 on Tue May 23 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

149 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

recreational facilities
landscaping
naturalistic
amenities
formal gardens
ergonomic
symmetric designs
inclusive
accessible
accommodations
native plant species
societal changes
visitor services
community events
evolution
modern playgrounds
wildflower meadows

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The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, owning a home is more important rather than renting one. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspaper or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smart phone. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?