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MamadjonovSamandar: Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

#mamadjonovsamandar #topic #doctors #computer #games #children #people
Many doctors believe that using pc
games
 for a period of time can have a detrimental effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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human mental and physical capabilities
while
 becoming a permanent impediment factor in their academic and professional
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
However
, The origin of
this
 situation seems to stem from mainly two causes
although
 several
solutions
 remain open to us. In
this
 essay, the causes and
solutions
 will be discussed and given a concluding view. Perhaps one of the most significant and inevitable
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
 is the lack of
attention
.
This
 means that especially
the
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apply
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young
children
 find it difficult to place their
attention
 on the subjects they are studying in the class which can lead to
decline
Add an article
a decline
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 in their academic score
while
 dropping their
attention
 level to ground zero.
In addition
 to
this
, young
children
 are often reluctant to put their energies
in
Change preposition
into
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 the physical
game
 because it requires endurance, stamina and willingness to put hard work
to
Change preposition
into
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 the
game
.
Secondly
, In today's technology-focussed world, most of the pc
games
 are built on the 3d view with infinite cool features which makes it hard for
the
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apply
show examples
young
students
 to resist the temptation and concentrate on
boring
Add an article
the boring
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 physical
game
 with requires
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
 of practice, strength and a regular work-out.
Furthermore
, these
children
 have indulged
to
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apply
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themselves in
games
 that they often don't take
Correct pronoun usage
their meal
show examples
meal
Fix the agreement mistake
meals
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 on time . There are many
solutions
 to
this
 problem but we are going to discuss some of the effective
solutions
 which can
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 us to overcome
this
 obstruction.
Firstly
, schools can incorporate mental and physical
games
 as a part of
school
Add an article
the school
show examples
 curriculum
while
 parents can try to encourage
students
 to actively participate in these
games
 by reducing their
attention
 towards
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
.
Furthermore
, school institutes can organize
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
game
 events with prizes
while
 highlighting the benefits of it mainly at
academic
Add an article
an academic
the academic
show examples
 level. It can act as a trigger to arouse
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 interest in these activities
Secondly
, It will help
students
 to become more proactive by removing sluggishness and
productive
Add a missing verb
being productive
show examples
 throughout their class. In conclusion, If a joint effort would be taken by
school
Correct article usage
the school
show examples
 and parents
then
 it can certainly drop the usage of
games
on
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apply
show examples
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
 which can be a beneficial factor for their academic and professional life.
Submitted by shethstuti9 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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