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Writing Samples
Band 4

The graph bbelow shows the amount of waste produced by three companies over a period 15 years

The graph bbelow shows the amount of waste produced by three companies over a period 15 years
#bbelow #amount #waste #three #companies #period #years
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The given data illustrates the
comparission
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comparison
 of three
campanies
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companies
 in terms of their
waste
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 output between 2000 and 2015. The given wastes
measured
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are measured
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 in
tonnes
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, there were significant changes in the amounts of
waste
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 produced by all three
companies
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show
Wrong verb form
shown
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 on the graph.
While
Linking Words
companies
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 A and
B
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 saw
waste
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 output all over the
15 year
Add a hyphen
15-year
show examples
 period, the amount of
waste
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 produced by
company
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C
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 slightly increased. In 200,
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company
Change the capitalization
Company
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 A produced 12
tonnes
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 of
waste
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while
Linking Words
companies
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B
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 and
C
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 produced approximately 8
tonnes
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 and 4
tonnes
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 of
waste
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 material respectively. Over the following 5 years, the
waste
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 output of both
companies
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B
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 and
C
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 rose by
aound
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around
 2
tonnes
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,
while
Linking Words
 the figure for
company
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 A tell by about 1 tonne. From 2005 to 2015,
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company
Change the capitalization
Company
show examples
 A decreased
waste
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 production by roughly 3
tonnes
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, and
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company
Correct your spelling
Company
show examples
B
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 reduced
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of
waste
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 by around 7
tonnes
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,
Linking Words
however
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,however
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company
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c
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 save
increasing
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an increasing
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 trend till the end of the period and increased
almost
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by almost
show examples
 4
tonnes
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. By the end of 2015,
company
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C
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 had risen to 10
tonnes
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,
while
Linking Words
 amounts of
waste
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 from
companies
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 A and
B
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 had dropped to 8
tonnes
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 and 3
tonnes
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.
Submitted by tukezaliyeva96 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words waste, tonnes, companies, b, company, c with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amounts" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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