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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph provides information about the changing of inhabitants in three different of provinces of Oregon, the USA over the period in question.

The line graph provides information about the changing of inhabitants in three different of provinces of Oregon, the USA over the period in question.
The given line graph represents the
population
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 change in three different
region
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regions
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 of Oregon from 1940 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most crowded county was
Washington
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 for the period of 60 years, and
other
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in other
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 provinces: Columbia's and
Yamhill
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's
population
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 increased slowly and showed similar features over time. In 1940,
Washington
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's inhabitants were nearly 75
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thousands
Change to singular
thousand
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 and
increased
Correct pronoun usage
this increased
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 gradually
for
Change preposition
over
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next
Correct article usage
the next
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 30 years. The
population
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 of
Washington
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 was roughly three times higher than its closest counterpart which was
Yamhill
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,
then
Linking Words
 inclined rapidly from 1970 to 2000. Eventually,
Washington
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's inhabitants reached well over 240
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thousands
Fix the agreement mistake
thousand
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 of individuals, which was a peak, in 2000. County of Colombia and
Yamhill
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 had quite similar
trend
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trends
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 during
60-year
Add an article
a 60-year
the 60-year
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 period.
Yamhill
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's
population
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 slightly increased to 45
thousands
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 of people in 1970,
whereas
Linking Words
 Colombia's
population
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 only increased by 5
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thousands
Change to singular
thousand
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 citizens and reached just over 30
thousands
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 of individuals.
Then
Linking Words
, in the next 30 years, both
Yamhill
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 and Colombia approximately doubled
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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population
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 and reached 90 and 75
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thousands
Change to singular
thousand
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 respectively.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, washington, yamhill, thousands with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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