The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram illustrates the
process
of
sugar
products from the first step on the farm as
sugar
canes until the final steps which are converted to common
sugar
. There are 7 steps for product sugars that begin from growing in farmland and finish with drying and cooling
at the end
of
this
process
.
According to
these figures, the long-term of
this
process
is in the first step with spending about 12-18 months on mature
sugar
cane in farmland.
Then
the owner is able to cut down and gather their canes with manuals or machines. After that, the canes are converted to juice by a crusher device at the third level.
In addition
, in the fourth stage, the
sugar
juice is eliminated by a limestone filter in purifying juice. which becomes syrup at high temperature in the evaporator tool
then
the
sugar
crystals must divide from the syrup in stage 6 with the usage of a centrifuge device.
At the end
of the
process
,
this
product has to store in a particular place until drying and cooling be complete.
Submitted by amirhsina on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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