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Band 3.5

Children should play online games nowadays. Discuss advantages and disadvantages.

#children #games
Nowadays all people seat
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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, even children.
However
 youngster seat
in
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on
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 more than adults.
Destipe
Correct your spelling
Despite
 the fact, they are always on
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 playing vice, of
course
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,course
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 bet
develop
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develops
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 teenagers, but they can be so dangerous
,
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apply
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 because
on
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apply
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social networks or
deversion
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diversion
 can affect
psyche
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the psyche
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 of juniors. In
introduction
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the introduction
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 I will say, can heir play online wager now or trust recreation
.
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?
show examples
 Now we will analyze their pros and cons.
Firstly
, kids play only popular
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
 of chance like, free fire, pubg,
roblox
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Roblox
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 and so on. In my
opinion
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,opinion
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 pastimes can develop offspring, the fact that every game
are
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is
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 special.
Secondly
, it is too bad that throw spoil the psyche of children, since they always play them,
for example
, because of gambling like free fire, they become aggressive,
impatient
Correct word choice
and impatient
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, even playing non-stop, their eyesight
also
 deteriorates, and many things are forgetful. They
now
Correct your spelling
know
show examples
 that they get worse and worse but they still play. Studies have shown that people obsessed with vice are more likely to experience depression and anxiety than others. In
scion
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Scion
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,
this
 is expressed in increased excitability,
lack
Correct word choice
and lack
show examples
 of communication skills. Alarm signals: inability to concentrate, sleep disturbance, anxiety, irritation and social phobias. In conclusion, they become addicted to online
bet
Replace the word
betting
show examples
. Play often
contain
Correct subject-verb agreement
contains
show examples
 propaganda, smoking, alcoholism, drug addiction, violence and even cruelty,
in addition
, they cause mental addiction and nervous breakdowns.
Also
, vision deteriorates and when playing at night, the biological regime gets lost.
Submitted by saginbekovaaikerim on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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