family members and friends caring fotr elderly people find it hard to spend enough time looking after them.what are the causes of this problem?what solutions can you suggest?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The
Change the article
A

It appears that the phrase large number does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

show examples
large number of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

admitted that it is hard to look after family elderly
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members

It seems that member may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
as well as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

care
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

them
Change preposition
for them

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
oftenly
Correct your spelling
often

If you don’t want oftenly to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
Personally
Add a comma
,Personally

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Personally. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
I believe
reason
Add an article
the reason

The noun phrase reason seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
of
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

problem is
urbanization
Add an article
the urbanization

The noun phrase urbanization seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
of big cities
Linking Words
Linking Words
also
Correct word choice
and also

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
financial
Add an article
a financial
the financial

The noun phrase financial inadequate condition seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
inadequate condition of
majority
Correct article usage
the majority

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
. There are few
solution
Change to a plural noun
solutions

The singular countable noun solution follows the quantifier few, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

show examples
to
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

and
further
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

I will explain. In
modern
Add an article
the modern

The noun phrase modern world seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
world, it is undeniable that visiting grandparents for
reasonable
Add an article
a reasonable

The noun phrase reasonable time seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is complicated. In
Linking Words
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
three
decades
Add a comma
,decades

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase In last three decades. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
cities are crowded more than ever which
results
Add the preposition
inresults
fromresults

The phrase following the intransitive verb results seems to be missing a preposition. Consider adding one.

show examples
biggest companies, departments and universities
placed
Add a missing verb
being placed

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
at
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
city
Add an article
the city

The noun phrase city center seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre

The spelling of center is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

show examples
,
as a consequence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

youngsters tend to live
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
downtown
on the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

older
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

want to live in suburban places because of congestion.
As a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in order to come to their older family
member
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

takes
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in South Korea, Seoul to Busan takes at least 2 hours by train
moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, come
and go
Add a hyphen
and-go

It seems that and go is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

show examples
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is roughly 4 to 6 hours. In
second
Add an article
the second

The noun phrase second place seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
place,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are financially dependent
from
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
their employment,
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
other word, they have to work every single day even
some
Correct word choice
though some

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
of them are working overtime.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

results
young
Change preposition
in young

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's overwork which is necessary to live. To put
another
Correct pronoun usage
it another

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
way, adults are working too much
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

for
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

reason they want to rest their weekend
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of visiting family. To tackle
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue,
government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
should implement
Add an article
the law
show examples
Add an article
the law

The noun phrase law seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws
show examples
of
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
working
Correct article usage
the working

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
environment,
overtime
Correct word choice
and overtime

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
as well as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

action to increase
Correct article usage
the economical
show examples
Correct article usage
the economical

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
state.
As a
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

result
Add a comma
,result

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase As a result. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are having enough money and
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to
care
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

their
Change preposition
for their

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
family
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members

It seems that member may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

under the government's fund, building nursing
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes

It seems that home may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
care
Correct word choice
and care

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
places will be helpful to
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

who can't afford
taking
Change the verb form
to take

Taking doesn’t seem to work here.

show examples
care
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of older
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
To sum up
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, financial
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions

It seems that condition may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
and urbanization are
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons

It seems that reason may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
that
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can't look after their family
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members

It seems that member may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
even if they want to. In order to solve
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

problem government should support
economical
Replace the word
economic

The word economical doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions

It seems that condition may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

make nursing places as well. If they would do
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, caring family
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members

It seems that member may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
will be no more problem in future.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: