IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, many people throw a lot of food from restaurants and shops, why do you think people waste in this way? what can be done to reduce the away of food thrown away?

#countries #people #food #restaurants #shops #waste
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Food
waste
 is a prevalent issue in many countries.
Although
 it has various underlying reasons for
this
 trend, I suppose that
this
 problem can be addressed through practical solutions. one of the primary reasons why
food
 is wasted is the lack of foresight of both
restaurants
 and individuals. Some people tend to purchase
food
 items in bulk to save money, but
due to
 their hectic schedules, they often forget to consume them or end up disposing of them when they become spoiled,
besides that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they usually order over
food
 than necessary
this
 can lead to they can not consume over. Meanwhile,
restaurants
 tend to overproduce to cater to customers' demands which can lead to unsold
food
 that goes to
waste
 because
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 not be reused. To produce
this
 problem, there are several feasible measures that can be implemented, the first solution is that the government should raise awareness by launching education programs that educate inhabitants on the
prober
Correct your spelling
process
show examples
to buy
Change preposition
of buying
show examples
 and
manage
Wrong verb form
managing
show examples
food
 items, including the cost and
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
 of
waste
food
. Another approach is to achieve a balance between
food
 production and consumption by employing experienced managers to accurately predict the amount of
food
 required for the day.
Consequently
,
restaurants
 can save a lot of
food
 and
cost
Correct subject-verb agreement
costs
show examples
 that way they can enhance their revenues. In conclusion, inadequate planning in purchasing and preparing meals by individuals and
restaurants
 is a significant contributor to the
food
waste
 problem.
However
, From my perspective,
this
 will be tackled by organizing awareness-raising initiatives and hiring professional managers.
Submitted by nguyenhoanganh64195123 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Task Response: The essay addresses the causes of food waste and proposes solutions to reduce it. However, there is a lack of depth and development in the ideas presented. Expand on the reasons for food waste and offer more specific and detailed solutions to meet the requirements of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a generally logical structure, but the introduction and conclusion could be more comprehensive. Additionally, the essay lacks clear topic sentences and transitions between ideas. Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and include transitions to improve the coherence of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: