IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#pace #life #people #food #meals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no doubt that the busy routines of recent times have caused many unhealthy habits,
such
Linking Words
 as the growing consumption of fast foods.
While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that
this
Linking Words
 concerning trend contributes to their success at
work
Use synonyms
, others prefer to spend more
time
Use synonyms
 having proper
meals
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both sides of the topic and explain my support for the latter view. The fast pace of modern life has left short breaks for
people
Use synonyms
’s
meals
Use synonyms
, so fast
food
Use synonyms
 could be considered advantageous for them.
This
Linking Words
 is because jobs in large cities are highly demanding, making employees
work
Use synonyms
 for long hours and take on extra shifts, to make more money. These workaholic individuals end up eating fast
food
Use synonyms
 as they believe that a lunch break,
for example
Linking Words
, is a waste of
time
Use synonyms
 that would probably impact their performance and productivity at
work
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, these
people
Use synonyms
 are normally more concerned about making money than being healthy, ignoring the consequences of fast-
food
Use synonyms
 consumption, which are many.
For instance
Linking Words
, recent research has indicated that the main cause of obesity and heart attack today is the excessive consumption of
this
Linking Words
 type of
food
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, apart from
time
Use synonyms
, there are no disadvantages to following a healthier diet with complete
meals
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, workers who have little breaks to eat can prepare their
meals
Use synonyms
 during the weekends, storing them separately on the freeze for each day of the week, so they will not waste
time
Use synonyms
 cooking during the week.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who are motivated to follow a healthier diet have less chance of contracting serious diseases caused by industrialized
food
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 who succeed professionally
proved
Wrong verb form
prove
show examples
 to have a balanced diet, which actually helps their productivity at
work
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 them.
As a result
Linking Words
, when
people
Use synonyms
 avoid fast
food
Use synonyms
 and have proper
meals
Use synonyms
, their performance at
work
Use synonyms
 can improve.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 there are advantages of eating
fast-
Correct your spelling
fast food
show examples
food
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as saving
time
Use synonyms
 for working tasks, these must not be weighed against the health issues
this
Linking Words
 habit may cause. Personally, I feel that these benefits do not outweigh the drawbacks.
Submitted by fredpolfernandes on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supports the main argument of the essay. Try to maintain a balanced structure throughout the essay.
task achievement
Make sure to fully address the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of fast food consumption. Provide specific examples and evidence to support your points.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: