IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain.The table shows where the money came from and charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparison where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain.The table shows where the money came from and charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparison where relevant.
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The given table and pie charts provide statistics about the
budget
Use synonyms
 of the
police
Use synonyms
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the source of money and the way of its distribution in a city of Britain in 2017 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
,the
allocated
Replace the word
allocation
show examples
 found was higher in 2018 than the previous year.
In addition
Linking Words
,National Government supported the highest amount of bill
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
spent on the salaries of officers and staff.
According to
Linking Words
 the given table, there are three sources which provide the
budget
Use synonyms
 for the
police
Use synonyms
, namely National Government, Local Taxes and grants.National Government provide the highest amounts of money in both years which were 175.5
m
Use synonyms
 in 2017 and 177.8m in 2018.Another source of payment was local taxes which were 91.2m and 102.3m in 2017 and 2018 ,respectively.
In addition
Linking Words
, some of the
police
Use synonyms
budget
Use synonyms
 were provided by other sources
for example
Linking Words
 grants which were 38m in 2017 and 38.5m in 2018.
Finally
Linking Words
, the total amount of financial support which was given to the
police
Use synonyms
budget
Use synonyms
 was 318.6m in 2018.
According to
Linking Words
 the given pie charts, the
budget
Use synonyms
 was distributed in three categories including salaries,technology,and building and transport.The amount of money which was spent on salaries was higher than the other groups and was 75% in 2017 and 69% in 2018.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the least wealth was distributed in the field of technology which was increased in 2018.At
last
Linking Words
, in 2017 and 2018, 17% of the allocated fund was spent on building and transport.
Submitted by shabnam.sohanian on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to, in addition".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, police, m with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "provide" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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