The table shows information about department stores and online stores in Australia in 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

#information #department #stores #australia #summarise #features #comparisons

The table demonstrates information about

department

stores

in Australia in 2011

Overall

, the number of businesses in Australia was highly different.

Department

stores

are fewer than online

stores

301 people. It can be seen in the table that the profit at online

stores

is more than

department

stores

56 million AUD. In other, the sales revenue of online

stores

was much higher than in

department

stores

. Can see that different cause online they sell 13400 million AUD,

besides

that

department

store only sales 12700 million AUD.

Finally

, the percentage of the growth, at online

stores

the percentage is 0.6%, but in the

department

stores

just 0.4%. online more than

department

0.2%.

Submitted by yeshomeclass on Thu Jun 01 2023

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words department, stores with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

111 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some companies encourage workers to be competitive, while others encourage temawokr. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

When choosing a job, salary is the most important decision. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems.

The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has transformed the way we live, communicate and do business. Mobile phones can also be the cause of social or medical problems. What forms do these problems take? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of mobile phones?

The relatively recent development of games on phones, computers, and TV consoles is extremely popular with people all over the world. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such electronic games?