The map shows how coastal land develops into a coastal park.

The map shows how coastal land develops into a coastal park.
The two maps describe the improvement of coastal land change to coastal
park
Fix the agreement mistake
parks
show examples
.
Overall
,
it is clear that
the development includes more trees, green space and facilities for residents. ‏
To begin
with, what once were
animal's
Change noun form
animal
show examples
area ‏and unused land converted
to take
Verb problem
into
show examples
a circular lake with a lot of trees taking a place ‏ around the lake.
Moreover
, The agricultural area
alter to
Verb problem
has
show examples
woods with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
trees ‏ twice the lake size e.
Furthermore
, ‏They linked the previous two areas with the footpath ‏and car park in the centre,
regard to replace
Wrong verb form
regarding replacing
show examples
the old fam building
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
car
Park
Fix capitalization
park
show examples
. ‏
Secondly
, new
cafe
Fix the agreement mistake
cafes
show examples
were built
southern
Change preposition
on southern
show examples
the road,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
‏main road and cliffs remained untouched. ‏
thirdly
, many facilities after evolution are there , they add ‏steps at the side of the cliff to the
resident
Replace the word
residence
show examples
.
Finally
, after the
improvement
Add a comma
improvement,
show examples
a lot of people visit the ‏beach. ‏
Submitted by demo_sq on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "improvement" was used 2 times.
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