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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the table made by a coffee shop in an office building on a typical weekday. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the table made by a coffee shop in an office building on a typical weekday. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#coffee #shop #office #weekday #information #features #comparisons
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The table illustrates the
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
 made by a
coffee
Use synonyms
 shop in an office building on weekends. Look at from
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
overall
Linking Words
, In
office
Add an article
an office
the office
show examples
 building 4 types of
menu
Add an article
the menu
a menu
show examples
 of
meal
Add an article
the meal
a meal
show examples
 and drink served
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 weekdays,
such
Linking Words
 as
Coffee
Use synonyms
, Tea,
patries
Correct your spelling
pastries
parties
, and
sandwich
Use synonyms
.
The
Correct article usage
Coffee
show examples
coffee
Use synonyms
 is most
purchase
Replace the word
purchased
show examples
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
 menu
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the rest days,
while
Linking Words
 tea is
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
 sold out.
According to
Linking Words
 morning
time
Use synonyms
 between 7:30 am to 10:30 am,
coffee
Use synonyms
 and pastries has been sold out at peak state which is 265 and 275 respectively,
whereas
Linking Words
sandwich
Use synonyms
 declined to purchase by peoples, which is only 50. After next 2 hours
sandwich
Use synonyms
 steadily rise and reach at 200,
while
Linking Words
 in
this
Linking Words
 hours teas ratio dropped down and come to 50. In the afternoon
time
Use synonyms
,
Coffee
Use synonyms
 and pastries hold by peoples again (140 and 150),
while
Linking Words
sandwich
Use synonyms
 rapidly down (40). In the evening
time
Use synonyms
 from 5:30 pm to 8:30 pm,
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
sandwich
Use synonyms
amount
Use synonyms
 is grow,
coffee
Use synonyms
 and pastries
amount
Use synonyms
 fall, which is nearly 80. In the morning
time
Use synonyms
 great purchase the meal and drink, which is total 700, after 2 hours vends total 530,
then
Linking Words
 in the evening and
last
Linking Words
 afternoon, which is lowest bought by peoples,
To sum up
Linking Words
 top rank sold by individuals was
coffee
Use synonyms
 drink has been highest
amount
Use synonyms
 earn (795), and tea has been lowest
amount
Use synonyms
 stolen.
Submitted by panetariyaragini78 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, sandwich, time, amount with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • peak hours
  • typical weekday
  • busiest period
  • least busy period
  • sales volume
  • time intervals
  • items sold
  • employee preferences
  • observable patterns
  • anomalies
  • trends
  • dips
  • spikes
  • data analysis
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