In some places, teenagers are encouraged to get part-time job while they are still in school. Do the advantages of teenagers working outweigh the disadvantages?

Teenager working has become a trend nowadays.
Therefore
, teenagers are persuaded in a few locations, to secure part-time jobs, even if they did not complete their schooling yet.
This
essay will discuss both, the merits and the demerits of
this
trend.
However
, its advantages are more as compared to its disadvantages. There are many benefits of doing part-time work for teens.
Firstly
, they can earn extra money, which will be really helpful for them to manage their tuition fees.
Secondly
, doing a job alongside studying will help them to build many innovative skills
such
as cooperation, teamwork, budgeting and many more.
Last
,but not least, they will not have spare time to indulge in criminal activities like drugs or robbery.
Apart from
this
, they can build a large friend circle which will be helpful in future goals . They will learn the value of money and will utilise it perfectly because it is their hard-earned money.
On the contrary
, teenagers might have to face failure in their study achievements because they
could
Verb problem
do
show examples
not have enough time to complete their education requirements.
For example
, assignments.
Moreover
, there will be no free time left for their extracurricular activities, which are compulsory
as well as
lifestyle.
Furthermore
, they can lead astray when their teammates
can be
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
older or addicted to some bad things. In conclusion, I would like to say there should be a limitation on part-time hours, approximately 10 to 15 and with the help of
this
we can say that the pros outweigh its cons.
Submitted by jaspreetkaur45047 on

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task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers working part-time, but the response could be more balanced by providing equal attention to both sides.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The overall structure of the essay is clear with an introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas and examples could be more connected, leading to a more coherent discussion.

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