In some places, teenagers are encouraged to get part-time job while they are still in school. Do the advantages of teenagers working outweigh the disadvantages?

Teenager working has become a trend nowadays.

Therefore

, teenagers are persuaded in a few locations, to secure part-time jobs, even if they did not complete their schooling yet.

This

essay will discuss both, the merits and the demerits of

this

trend.

However

, its advantages are more as compared to its disadvantages. There are many benefits of doing part-time work for teens.

Firstly

, they can earn extra money, which will be really helpful for them to manage their tuition fees.

Secondly

, doing a job alongside studying will help them to build many innovative skills

such

as cooperation, teamwork, budgeting and many more.

Last

,but not least, they will not have spare time to indulge in criminal activities like drugs or robbery.

Apart from

this

, they can build a large friend circle which will be helpful in future goals . They will learn the value of money and will utilise it perfectly because it is their hard-earned money.

On the contrary

, teenagers might have to face failure in their study achievements because they

could

Verb problem

show examples

not have enough time to complete their education requirements.

For example

, assignments.

Moreover

, there will be no free time left for their extracurricular activities, which are compulsory

as well as

lifestyle.

Furthermore

, they can lead astray when their teammates

can be

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

older or addicted to some bad things. In conclusion, I would like to say there should be a limitation on part-time hours, approximately 10 to 15 and with the help of

this

we can say that the pros outweigh its cons.

Submitted by jaspreetkaur45047 on Sat Jun 03 2023

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task response

Task Response: The essay addresses the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers working part-time, but the response could be more balanced by providing equal attention to both sides.

coherence cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The overall structure of the essay is clear with an introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas and examples could be more connected, leading to a more coherent discussion.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some places, teenagers are encouraged to get part-time job while they are still in school. Do the advantages of teenagers working outweigh the disadvantages?

You have just missed a friend’s party. Write a letter to apologise. In your letter: apologise to your friend explain why you did not attend the party say what you plan to do to make up for missing the party.

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Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many large supermarkets are being built today while the number of small shops is decreasing. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

People should only concentrate on a single skill for life because it is the best way to succeed. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?