In some places, teenagers are encouraged to get part-time job while they are still in school. Do the advantages of teenagers working outweigh the disadvantages?

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Teenager working has become a trend nowadays.

Therefore

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, teenagers are persuaded in a few locations, to secure part-time jobs, even if they did not complete their schooling yet.

This

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essay will discuss both, the merits and the demerits of

this

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trend.

However

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, its advantages are more as compared to its disadvantages. There are many benefits of doing part-time work for teens.

Firstly

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, they can earn extra money, which will be really helpful for them to manage their tuition fees.

Secondly

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, doing a job alongside studying will help them to build many innovative skills

such

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as cooperation, teamwork, budgeting and many more.

Last

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,but not least, they will not have spare time to indulge in criminal activities like drugs or robbery.

Apart from

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this

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, they can build a large friend circle which will be helpful in future goals . They will learn the value of money and will utilise it perfectly because it is their hard-earned money.

On the contrary

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, teenagers might have to face failure in their study achievements because they

could

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not have enough time to complete their education requirements.

For example

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, assignments.

Moreover

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, there will be no free time left for their extracurricular activities, which are compulsory

as well as

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lifestyle.

Furthermore

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, they can lead astray when their teammates

can be

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are

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older or addicted to some bad things. In conclusion, I would like to say there should be a limitation on part-time hours, approximately 10 to 15 and with the help of

this

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we can say that the pros outweigh its cons.

Submitted by jaspreetkaur45047 on Sat Jun 03 2023

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task response

Task Response: The essay addresses the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers working part-time, but the response could be more balanced by providing equal attention to both sides.

coherence cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The overall structure of the essay is clear with an introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas and examples could be more connected, leading to a more coherent discussion.

13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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In some places, teenagers are encouraged to get part-time job while they are still in school. Do the advantages of teenagers working outweigh the disadvantages?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You would liek to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accomodation and cost.

More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?

The plans below show the layout of a university 's sports centre now,and how it will look after redevelopment.

Some people think parents should teach their children how to be a good members of society. however, believe that school is the best place to learn. Discus