Some people think students should study the science of food and how to prepare it. Others think students should spend time on important subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People hold conflicting views about both methods of beneficial studying for
students
in school.
While
there are benefits of learning
Food
Science
in order to make
food
preparation, I would argue that
students
should be taught about essential disciplines. It is believed that nutrients in all foods have different vitamins and minerals.
Besides
, fruits and vegetables that naturally are
nutrient rich
Add a hyphen
nutrient-rich
show examples
and help people to prevent the disease before it starts to grow up. The school teaches children about
food
science
and how to cook correctly, which is
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best way for
students
to gain
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
knowledge
about cooking and keep their body more healthy.
For example
, a 45-year-old man in HCM City, who got botulinum poisoning after eating fermented fish sauce, died after hours of healing.
Therefore
, if
students
have a
science
of
food
knowledge
, they will prevent these cases carefully for themself and their
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
.
Nevertheless
,
students
also
spend their time on useful subjects because of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
core value. It would be more beneficial for them to choose the courses that they have an interest in or they want to explore. When
students
have a passion for math, it will help them develop their
knowledge
about logical thinking, analysis but
also
creativity,
imagination
Correct word choice
and imagination
show examples
.
Furthermore
, studying history helps
students
understand obviously the origin,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
root of a nation. If children have a strong awareness of education and skills, they can seek job opportunities easier than someone who is not equipped with
knowledge
.
To sum up
,
although
some people think that it is more beneficial for
students
to study
food
science
. I personally believe that essential subjects bring more benefits
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
students
Submitted by joyce.ta213 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: