2. Some people think that famous people can help draw attention to important social issues. Others believe that the celebrities can make the problems seem less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years, whether
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
celebrities can have
positve
Correct your spelling
positive
effects on vital social
issues
has been in the spotlight of public
attention
.
While
there are some
people
argue
Correct pronoun usage
who argue
show examples
that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
can make serious
problems
seem less important, I assert that they can provide to draw
attention
to significant
issues
. In
this
essay, the
reasons
for my belief will be elaborated. On the one hand, many
people
believe that important social
issues
to be known through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
can make a negative effect. As for the major reason, if the
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
talk about social
issues
, the
problems
will decrease reliabilities from
people
since the celebrities do not have professional knowledge.
For example
, in South Korea, some celebrity told his thinking which was related to policy,
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
the information was false since he has not learned about
this
field.
As a result
, many
people
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
suffered from misunderstanding and they tended not to listen
about
Change preposition
to
show examples
others
Change noun form
others'
other's
show examples
issues
, even though they are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
significant
problems
in society.
On the other hand
, whether famous
people
can help concentrate on
attention
to
issues
also
appears to have a number of valid
reasons
to consider. In terms of the first aspect to take into account, the
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
have enormous influence. It is a well-known fact that many
people
would like to follow them
as
Correct word choice
and
show examples
watching
Wrong verb form
watch
show examples
their
actings
Replace the word
actions
show examples
.
For instance
,
according to
research, some famous
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
donated to volunteering organizations and reported on Instagram. Many
people
watched it, and they
also
donated to a number of charities and reported on Instagram since they were huge fans of the
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
or wanted to follow them.
As a result
,
donation
Add an article
the donation
a donation
show examples
was
trend
Add an article
a trend
the trend
show examples
during short terms.
Therefore
, I believe that whether
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
can have a positive effect
about
Change preposition
on
show examples
social
issues
has to be prioritized
due to
the
reasons
stated above. In conclusion,
although
the two opposing views have their own strong points, I am of the opinion that whether
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
celebrites
Correct your spelling
celebrities
can allow
to draw
Change the verb form
drawing
show examples
people
's
attention
to significant social
problems
should be considered more importantly
due to
the aforementioned
reasons
.
Submitted by khj8638 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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