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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given table and pie graphs illustrate data on the police
budget
 flow between 2017 and 2018 in a territory of Britain. The table reveals the different
sources
 of income, and the pie charts demonstrate the proportion of
budget
 distribution
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 different categories.
Overall
, the most important money
sources
Fix the agreement mistake
source
show examples
 was
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
 government both in 2017, and 2018, and the biggest expenses
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 for salaries between 2017 and 2018.
It is clear that
 the
budget
 had coming from different
sources
, and the most significant figures
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
total
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 provided by
national
Add an article
the national
show examples
 government with 175.7 million pounds, and 177.8 million pounds, in 2017, and in 2018, respectively.
On the other hand
, local taxes were the second-highest income in the period of 2 years.
Although
 there were other money
sources
such
 as grants,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
only one-tenth of the
budget
created
Add a missing verb
was created
show examples
 with those alternatives.
According to
 the given pie charts, the three main money outcomes were salaries, technology, and
infrastructures
Fix the agreement mistake
infrastructure
show examples
. In 2017,
technology
Correct article usage
the technology
show examples
 and buildings proportion was only a quarter of the total outcome, a year later,
this
 ratio increased to almost one-third of the
budget
. For 2017 and 2018, the dominant expense was Salaries by far.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, sources with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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