ome people say that it is more important to spend time for developing a career. Some people say that it is important to share time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#ome #people #time #career #friends

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It is believed

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apply

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some individuals that career advancement should be the top priority,

while

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the rest argues that spending time with loved ones and friends. From my perspective, I approve of the second view, and all my explanations

as well as

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some relevant illustrations will be given in

this

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essay.

To begin

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with, a mass of people think that money is more crucial than anything else. It can buy happiness, peace, and much more. Many of them always attempt to work extra hours for the purpose of earning more bucks or promotion in work. It is because they do not want to worry about money issues,

for instance

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, if their families have a disease, the money can be used without borrowing anyone.

Additionally

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, it

also

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depends on people's

honorable

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honourable

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. They do not want to be inferior to their professional peers, which is why some individuals have a desire to be promoted to high positions

such

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as secretaries or managers.

On the other hand

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, families and friends should be prioritized more since they are the ones who always love and respect us, no matter what we have done.

Also

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, parents can guide us in achieving success and show their children the path that leads to it.

In addition

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, human beings need to express feelings

with

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others,

consequently

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, no one is more appropriate than loved ones and peers.

To conclude

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although

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progressing occupation is pivotal for a person, families and peers are more than that. No one can grow without love and upbringing. Without them, a person's life cannot be bright.

Submitted by soy.jen.0806 on Mon Jun 05 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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ome people say that it is more important to spend time for developing a career. Some people say that it is important to share time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

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